THIRTEEN THINGS NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT BEING A MOM
Because this blog is really the only "baby book" so to speak I am keeping for Reese I want it to be a good way for all of us to look back and remember what was going on at each stage in her life..therefore I must include a few of the not so fun times as well.
1.) Crying!
I never knew how much a baby really cries and how much it would break my heart to hear it. Also realizing that sometimes you just gotta let her cry a little...I hate this!!
2.) I'm so TIRED!
Really will she ever sleep all night? Although once or twice for a few week in her life she has started to sleep all night, overall she doesn't sleep all night which means neither do I.
3.) Guilt
I feel guilty for leaving her, I feel guilty for not leaving her and then wishing I could hide in the closet because I just need a little break. I feel guilty for pretty much everything..because I wander if somehow whatever I am doing as a Mother will cause her to grow up and be a wacko!
4.) Worry
Again this is very similar to the guilt thing. I am constantly second guessing my decisions as a Mother. Does anyone know the right answer?
5.) Frustration
Reese has had a really hard week so I have just been wracking my brain as to what am I doing different to be causing this change. I have changed and changed again certain things in her day thinking this will help and still I am ending up with the same result-a really cranky baby. I even took her to the doctor and guess what absolutely nothing is wrong with her. Go figure?
6.) A weird job
I am ashamed to admit that before I had Reese I was one of those people who looked at stay at home moms and thought..what does she do all day? HA! Although I LOVE being at home with Reese there are some days that I think my old "real" job was so much easier then this. What's even worse is that I was good at my job, I could see reports and numbers and tangible evidence that I was successful. Not so much as a Mommy.
7.) A Crazy Love!
I never knew how much I could love something. What I think is really cool is when I look at Reese with Bob and realize that he and I both love the same thing so much.
8.) Totally Unashamed!
Since Reese was born I am embarrassed of almost nothing. I have no problem breastfeeding in public..I never thought I would do this pre-baby. I sing, talk, dance or just act plain silly all the time and pretty much anywhere if it makes Reese happy. Of course Bob's favorite topic (sorry honey) I will discuss pretty much anything about her poop, vomit or any bodily function with anyone who seems remotely interested:)
9.) Joy
Just seeing her smile or hearing her laugh brings so much joy to my heart:)
10.) Simplicity
I have realized how little in life is really a necessity...really just give us a few diapers and a few random household items (Tupperware..etc) and we can be content all day.
11.)Indescribable Emotions
Hmmm...I was happy five minutes ago and now I'm crying???
12.) Fear
Everything I read about or hear on then news then I think..."what if she gets that?"
13.) Life Changes
I could go on and on about this but I won't...if you are a parent you get it!
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5 comments:
Love this post!!! All of them are so ture and I think all us moms feel the same. You think you talk about her poop now, wait till she does it on the potty and you start calling people to tell them about it. ;)
Cute post. Motherhood changes everything. I have that guilt thing too and every decision I make I worry how it is going to impact them in the future and whether or not I am screwing them up forever....ohh, the pressure!!
"Of course Bob's favorite topic (sorry honey) I will discuss pretty much anything about her poop, vomit or any bodily function with anyone who seems remotely interested:)"
This is my favorite and so true!! Ha ha - I was just discussing the abscence (sp?) of periods and breastfeeding with someone I had known for 5 minutes the other day.
Oh Becky, this is a great post! Everything you said is SO true!! Some even brought tears to my eyes. We just do the best we can and hope it's enough! You're a fabulous Mommy and one of these days, soon, Reese will show you how great she thinks you are....maybe by sleeping through the night, or walking straight into your arms, or kissing you when you're sad! And Yay! for breastfeeding still...that makes me SO happy!
I love this post. I totally suffer from the guilt thing... and Andrew is almost 5... I don't think that it ever goes away. Maybe it is there just to make us more aware? Alot of your blogs bring tears to my eyes...this one, your letter to Reese, your letter to Bob...etc. You're a great mom!!!
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